Making the best of Lagos horrendous traffic

Very few people can give you a better first hand information on the terrible-ility of Lagos traffic.
I work a regular 8 - 5 job (gone are the days of 8 - 4 or 9 - 5), so I actually spend 8hrs (minus-ing the 1hr lunch break) on the job. But believe you me, I wake up 4am daily and get back home at 9pm (upwards). So I spend 17hours every weekday on an 8hr weekday job!
So where the f did the other 8hrs (taking back the 1 hr lunch break) go to?! Well, it went to rushing to beat the traffic and getting stuck in the traffic.

But thatz not what this post is about.
Rather, I want to show you how to made hours spent in traffic something to look forward to.
Firstly, we need to be on the same page.
1. If you live very close to your workplace, please relocate.
2. If you drive to work, or some significant other does the driving. Please quit that car.
3. If you take a staff bus, oh dammit! How do you cope with those old men? Please quit.
4. If you will like to continue reading this post, please take only public transport (preferably Danfo) to work daily.

Now we are good to go.
The trick in enjoying the traffic is Positioning, every other thing automatically comes as an addon (freebie) when you take the public transport.
So how do you position yourself properly?
1. Never seat in the row directly behind the driver. Please don't ask why, this is experience talking.
2. If you want to use your iPad in the bus, please don't seat at the column next to the door.
3. Finally, don't try to make a new friend in the bus. Even if the hot chick beside you is unconsciously using your shoulder for a pillow.

Now that you're well positioned to enjoy the traffic, all that remains is for you to keep an open-mind and you will be in for a mighty enjoyable travel experience every weekday.

P.S.> I have been doing this for a really long time now, and I pledge to refund your Transportation Fee if you followed my advice and still couldn't enjoy the traffic.